Great Achievements in Unemployment; Or, How I Spent My “Winter Vacation”

So now that I am firmly entrenched in “in between jobs” mode, I’ve had a lot of time on my hands. Though I do not feel that bad about being laid off of a job I truly hated, even if I do finally get a teaching job, it won’t start until August. That’s a lot of free time! (Sidenote: it looks like I do have interest from a few schools, so maybe I won’t be a bum/house husband forever).

Anyways, it’s amazing what you can do with a shitload of free time. In years past, when I had summer/winter breaks (one of the perks of being a teacher - to offset crappy pay!), I’d usually just play video games and eat. But now, I do those things…AND MORE. Here follows my great achievements in unemployment:

1. This is probably the one that makes Aiko the happiest - I managed to shed 10 pounds. This is a direct result of having a puppy that doesn’t run out of energy until around 8pm at night…12 hours after he wakes up. To solve this dilemma, I started walking him at the lake near our house. At first, we only went a couple miles, and I hated having to actually move, so I’d get tired kinda quick. Porkchop, however, did not get tired. So, after a couple weeks, we went further, closer to 3 or 4 miles. Then, a funny thing happened - I started to like walking with him. The lake (and accompanying hiking trails) became actually fun to trek around. So now we’re up to 6 miles, and I’m probably going to go longer soon. 

2. Learning to cook more dishes. Aiko’s vegetarianism has led to a lot of kitchen experiments, but it’s been fun trying to come up with recipes that are a) meatless and b) still filling. I think I’ve settled on a few dishes that I know I can pull off for sure - potato leek soup, Szechuan eggplant, my friend Kristine’s veggie lasagna (which yields tons of leftovers), my mom’s baked beans recipe, lots of various stir fries, cous cous with sauteed veggies, various pasta sauces (from scratch!), etc. 

3. 3 stars on every Angry Birds level. Including Angry Birds Seasons and all the golden eggs. I’m now moving on to Cut the Rope.

4. Games completed: Dead Space 2 (very good), Donkey Kong Country Returns (super fun), Fable 3 (letdown of the year). Waiting now for Yakuza 4, beating the last two Call of Duty games in the meantime (yes, I’m behind)

5. Unsurprisingly, I’ve watched a shit load of movies in the past three months. Netflix instant has definitely been a cure for boredom! Off of streaming, I’ve watched:

  • Mary and Max - awesome claymation film from Australia
  • Enter the Void - holy shit. Easily the biggest mindfuck of a movie I’ve ever seen.
  • Dogtooth - fucked up Greek movie about a fucked up Greek family.
  • Kings of Pastry -decent doc about a pastry competition in France
  • Train - shitty horror film notable only for setting the record for most fake blood in a film - broken later by Piranha 3-D
  • The Blob - 80’s remake of the 50’s classic, holds up pretty well
  • Friday the 13th 1 and 2 - the 80’s ones. They do not hold up well.
  • Un Chien Andalou - watched this again for the first time since college. Shock value has long worn off.
  • Art & Copy - great documentary about the advertising world
  • $9.99 - easily the most boring film I’ve seen in the last few years. All three of us watching it fell asleep.
  • Dear Zachary - the most devastating and amazing documentary on Streaming.
  • Seven Days - French thriller about a dude torturing the guy who killed his daughter. Not that great.
  • Beer Wars - another interesting doc. Netflix instant has a ton of documentaries, apparently.
  • Seventh Moon - piece of shit horror film.
  • UHF - another 80’s classic. Doesn’t hold up, but nostalgia ftw.
  • Jar City - fascinating Icelandic murder mystery film. Unsurprisingly being remade in the US.
  • The Betrayal - another doc, this one about how bad the US fucked over Laos during the Vietnam War. Focuses on one immigrant family.
  • Spring Fever - banned in China, but not as exciting as that would lead you to believe.
  • My Summer of Love - mmm, Emily Blunt.
  • Wild China - BBC doc series on China’s ecosystem. Pretty amazing stuff, actually.
  • Lila Says - French film about an Arabic teen falling in love. Pretty good.
  • An Education - This was nominated for Best Film a last year, I think. Not bad, but Saarsgard’s accent is totally unbelievable in it.
  • Merantau - Ong-bak, set in Indonesia. 
  • Kimjongilia - great doc on North Korea
  • The Drummer - really good Hong Kong/Taiwanese film about a guy learning taiko drumming, with a little crime action thrown in.
  • White on Rice - terrible, terrible Asian-American film about a stupid 40 something Japanese dude.
  • The Maid - awesome Chilean film about…a maid.
  • Woman is the Future of Man - I like Hong San-Soo’s films, but this was not one of his better ones.
  • Frozen - if you’ve seen Open Water…this is the same movie. But on a ski lift. With wolves waiting for the skiiers.
  • Barking Dogs Never Bite - debut film from the director of the Host. Pretty good.
  • Bottle Shock - fun little movie about Napa wine.
  • The Secret of Kells - one of the most stunning 2-d animated films, ever.
  • Vengeance - slightly stupid French/Hong Kong action film. Kinda fun, though.
  • Soul Kitchen - fun French film about a dude trying to run a restaurant and keep his girlfriend.
  • Exit Through the Gift Shop - fucking robbed at the Oscars. Killer film. Billed a doc, but I’d be shocked if it was real.
  • Paranormal Activity - finally saw it, since the friends I was supposed to watch it with in the theaters ditched me at the time. Not bad on the small screen.

And these were just the ones I saw on streaming. On disc, I’ve watched Machete (super fun, now one of Aiko’s all time favorite movies), Let Me In (the most unnecessary remake since Psycho), Kamui (shitty Japanese blockbuster about ninjas), Love and Pop (shitty Japanese film about call girls), Saw…7? (meh), Buried (really intense), Devil (don’t judge me. It wasn’t bad), Splice (not bad, not great), The Kids Are Alright (most overrated film of last year), The Horde (French zombie movie. Nothing new), Map of the Sounds of Tokyo (beautiful looking, poorly acted), The Karate Kid (better than expected…but still not that great), Exam (interesting until the end), Get Him to the Greek (huge let down).

6. I’ve read a few books, but not as many as I’ve liked. My goal is to finish between 30-40 books this year, but I’m only on my 6th. I’ve read World War Z by Max Brooks (awesome), The Monster of Florence by Doug Preston (meh), I Love Yous Are For White People by Lac Su (wanted it to be better than it was), and Villain by Yoichi Suchida (boring). Currently reading John Dies at the End by “David Wong” (author pseudonym). Not sure how I feel about it yet.

7. Approaching 500 Yelp reviews. Should be there by the end of the week. UPDATE: Review 500 complete.